John and Foon Fong

Found this cartoon from a blog after my story was published

2010-11-28T23:56:00.000+08:00

Front page today

2010-11-27T23:13:00.015+08:00

Saturday November 27, 2010

Houseman Glut
Too many new doctors and too few hospitals to train them

By LOH FOON FONG

foonfong@thestar.com.my

PETALING JAYA: The number of medical housemen undergoing clinical training in most government hospitals has increased and this has given rise to concern that they may not get sufficient experience.

With new medical schools opening up locally and lower fees being offered at new institutions abroad, around 4,000 Malaysian medical students are expected to graduate annually from 350 universities all over the world in the coming years.

Senior Hospital Kuala Lumpur (HKL) consultant physician Datuk Dr S. Jeyaindran said each specialist was supervising four times as many housemen compared to a decade ago.

“Five years ago, one houseman looked after 10 patients in hospital wards at any one time but now it is one to four patients,” said Dr Jeyaindran, who is HKL department of medicine head and national head for medicine at the Health Ministry.

“The concern is that these interns are seeing fewer patients and hence, have fewer opportunities to carry out adequate procedures. In some hospitals, there are more housemen than patients.”

Dr Jeyaindran said they were not only concerned about the increase in numbers but also their attitude.

“Some lack responsibility towards their patients,” he said, adding that there were also those who did not know how to give an accurate diagnosis and relied too much on investigative tools instead of clinical skills and getting the proper patient history.

Malaysian Medical Council ethics committee chairman Datuk Dr Abdul Hamid Abdul Kadir said several specialists had expressed concern about the large numbers and training hospitals were finding it difficult to cope.

“In the past, it was five housemen in each department but now it could be 20 to 30 for each department,” he said, adding that some specialists were overburdened by the workload.

Health Minister Datuk Seri Liow Tiong Lai said the ministry was aware of the issue and would be increasing the number of training hospitals.

He said the ideal ratio should be one specialist supervising five housemen with one houseman taking care of 14 hospital beds depending on discipline.

There were 38 hospitals providing training to more than 3,058 housemen last year.

However, the number increased to the current 6,253 housemen since the ministry increased the duration of housemanship from one year to two.

“This led to most hospitals, including those in Sabah and Sarawak, having an excess of housemen,” he said.

Hospitals that were chosen must be able to cater to six areas in which housemen need training – medical, surgical, paediatrics, obstetrics and gynaecology, orthopaedic and accident, and emergency, he said.

Liow also said that they would be getting 58 contract specialists from Egypt, India and Pakistan next month to help supervise housemen and reduce the burden of the specialists now.

He also said that the ministry had taken steps to overcome the lack of experience among housemen by making training compulsory for two years instead of one.

Time even for a movie during work

PETALING JAYA: Some housemen in a Klang Valley hospital have so little work that they can even catch a movie during their shift, claimed a medical officer, who declined to be named.

“It was because they knew that the medical officers (senior doctors) would just do the work instead,” she said yesterday.

She added that some specialists and heads of department were reluctant to give more work to housemen.

However, the doctor said she received adequate experience when she did her housemanship at the Sultanah Aminah Hospital in Johor.

Another doctor, who had recently completed his housemanship at the same hospital, said his peers in the Klang Valley also said they were not given enough responsibilities.

“Since the beginning of my housemanship and until the time I left two months ago, the housemen in the hospital where I was trained, had sufficient training on the job,” he said.

Aunt Lydia's baptism

2010-04-18T15:24:00.000+08:00

Aunt Lydia, my late father's sister, was baptised on Sunday, April 11, 2010. (Please ignore the date printed on the pictures, it was wrong.)

Aunt Lydia's husband, Uncle Thamo, John and I, my youngest brother, Keng Sing, and two cell members - cg leader, Patrick and member, Sandy - witnessed her baptism held in her house in Kelana Jaya.

Pastor Tan Moy How conducted the special moment by sprinkling because she was too weak to go to church and to go through immersion in the Damansara Utama Methodist Church pool.

Aunt Lydia, 70, was diagnosed with advanced stage kidney cancer last month and she has lost a lot of weight. She started having pains, which she thought was gastric pains, sometime in November last year.

Mum's reminder

2010-02-25T01:37:00.000+08:00

Today is exactly the 10th year since mum passed away. I recalled that it was also during the Chinese New Year season when she died at Pantai Hospital in Malacca after being diagnosed with 3rd stage stomach cancer at Mahkota Hospital. She didn’t die of the cancer but from complications after a palliative surgery.

It was excruciating for all her four children. It was also shocking since doctors had told us that most people survive the surgery. We thought we would have a few more months with her but it turned out to be two weeks after the diagnosis.

As my eldest brother and I packed her things up to be given away to charity, I recalled the very thing that she often reminded us children – when we die, there is not a single thing that we could bring with us – and hence she told us to live moderately and not be engulfed by greed and materialism but set our eyes on things above because we are only passing by this world. For this reason, in her own quiet manner, she often put her trust in the Lord despite enormous difficulties when dad passed away when we were all little.

I never ceased to be amazed at how she found much comfort and strength in the Lord and she could still think about the needs of others when she hardly had enough for herself. I saw that with her confidence in the Lord, she need not pity herself.

In her later years when all her children had grown up and she had more time to do her own thing, she would often visit and help her friends in need in her own capacity.

As I picked up her things, they reminded me of her words - that we cannot bring anything with us when we die. Not that I was not aware of the truth in what she said, but the truth was in my face.

I believe mum is proud that one of her sons has a semi-D house, a daughter who has a Master’s, another son who successfully runs his own tuition business and the eldest son who had faithfully helped her and his other siblings when life was initially difficult. However, I know that above all, she would be more concern about where we fix our eyes on.

Her reminders have helped me stay on course and rooted in things that have greater value, appreciate honest and sincere people as well as leave behind a legacy for our children/younger generation in whatever capacity we have. There was no mention about the last bit, but it was through her simple exemplary ways that had taught me that.

It always feels as though mum has gone Home only last year. The memory is always fresh even though it has been a decade.

Healthier us

2010-02-23T02:31:00.000+08:00

About a week before Christmas, John and I started to consume a certain nutritional shake for health reasons and to lose a few kilos, especially around the abdomen.
He had recommended the product to me since he had taken it for two months before our wedding in 2008 and became rather trim. He then stopped since I complained thinking that it was expensive and that he too wanted to maintain his weight by just going to the gym or taking walks in the park. But with his long working hours, he hardly got to do either. He had gone to the gym possibly less than five times a year.
So after our wedding, we both ballooned again to the weight we were before marriage. At our age, it was difficult to manage our weight. I could lose half a kg or a kg on my own but it requires a LOT of effort and discipline. It is difficult to lose weight because it is almost impossible to find healthy food whenever we eat out.
When John told me about the shake that I could take for breakfast to replace my usual breakfast, which was either fruits followed by fried bee hoon, roti canai or nasi lemak with Milo, or if I make my own breakfast, it would be a fruit, my favourite half boiled egg, bread with butter and Milo, I wanted to try it out because I often yearn for healthy breakfasts. I know that if I could have a healthy breakfast every morning, half the battle is won.
So I gave myself three days to try the shake because since it is soya based, I feared that I would suffer from joint aches as I sometimes would when drinking soya milk or eating tofu. I thought if I do not experience any bodily discomfort, I would take it daily. That’s because all processed food do cause some discomfort to my body. My friends told me that my body is like a barometer that gauges how “clean” a certain food is. It works better than the “halal” certification because even with halal food, they were not “clean” enough for my body.
This is how my body suffers when I take processed food:

1. Fried food/animal fat/cooked santan – this is the worst culprit for me. My hands will feel an intense burning sensation from inside within half hour after eating and that includes KFC, which I wish I can sometimes enjoy. A small pus will emerge on my face. Then my fingers will swell and the joints hurt the following morning.

2. Black tea – sore joints in the fingers, knees and sometimes toes and sleepless night even if I take it in the morning.

3. Coffee – sharp joint pains in the fingers, knees and toes and heart palpitations. Also sleepless night despite consuming it in the morning.

4. Burgers/sausages/cheese/canned food – fingers swell and joints ache

5. Milo – laboured breathing

6. Ajinomoto and other monosodium glutamate – shoulder aches and breathing discomfort

7. A sweet - put me to sleep or knock me unconcious within 15 minutes.

8.Soya/tofu – sometimes have joint aches

A specialist said I suffer from arthritis while Chinese physicians said I had poor blood circulation and toxin accumulation. Whatever it is called, I often dread eating, especially when I have to eat out, because I would suffer after the meal.
So for three days I tried the shake and I did not have any symptoms. I was intrigued by the product. I thought: What is this processed food that is as good as nature? So I decided to consume it daily.
Today is the second month I took the shake and I have lost almost 4kg. That’s a feat considering that we only took the shake for breakfast and hardly took it for dinner because of all the dinners John and I had to attend during Christmas and Chinese New Year. I was 8kg overweight and friends and colleagues had been asking whether I was pregnant but I haven’t had such questions asked for more than one month:).
More than the weight issue, my joint aches and swelling have subsided and I hardly have any of the symptoms anymore. I am not sure how the products have helped because I had only intended to take it as an ideal breakfast and to reduce my big abdomen. Amazingly, I now sleep well every night, unlike before.
Several years ago, doctors had advised me to take medication. I did for a short while and then stopped and tried various alternative medicine which didn’t work out. I had even gone for faith healing. While I could after that stood and walk for long periods without pain, the morning swelling and stiffness in my fingers would not go away. Finally, I told the Lord three months ago that if He was not healing me directly for some reason I might not understand yet, I had asked that He bring something to me to help me keep my symptoms under control. The good effects from the nutrition and special tea mix on my joints were totally unexpected. I consider my prayer answered. I can even enjoy a glass of wine now without my joints hurting.
John has lost more inches and his alarming visceral fat level has gone down two notches after drinking the tea mix daily. I cannot believe my eyes how it had worked so well with him. Mine, which was considered healthy but not excellent, had also gone down by one notch. So we have less fat around the vital organs now, which is considered more dangerous. Our skin texture too have also improved.
I have 4kg more to go and if all goes well, I should achieve my target in a month’s time since CNY is almost over and it is time to be serious about weight losing and being healthy. It’s not that I have not tried to be healthy. It is very difficult when we eat out most of the time.
John has another kg to go but his abdomen is still big although it has shrunken to half its size. It is best to couple the weight loss effort with exercise...
We are now enjoying a better quality of life and I no longer think that the product - Herbalife – is expensive. I would say it is value for money.
For me, I have in the last 15 years put health as a priority and spent less on clothes, accessories and electronic gadgets, hence, am willing to spend more on nutrition.

It was lost but now it's found

2009-12-14T00:21:00.000+08:00

It was another amazing week. I was in Parliament on Tuesday night and was rushing to get my work done. I was running late for a meeting with our lawyer who would brief us residents on our condo woes.

After listening to the parliament debate, I began typing my last story of the day at 7.30pm and then scooted off. I didn’t realise that I had forgotten to keep the digital recorder that I had put on a table to record the parliament debate, until midnight, just before I went to bed.

That was when I text a colleague who worked late that night and she said some reporters were asking a recorder that was left behind there and she didn’t know then that it was mine.

And so I thought I wouldn’t see it again since the colleague had lost hers for being forgetful.

The following morning, I was pleasantly surprised to see the digital recorder at the very spot I had put it the day before.

However, later in the day, when I was in the toilet, I forgot to remove my mobile phone out of the toilet for I had again, another rushing business, leaped out of the toilet when I realised that the minister I had been waiting for, was giving replies to the debate.

Again, I didn’t realise that I had left my phone in the toilet until 10 minutes later. I went to the toilet to look for it but it was gone and the two female security guards who used the same cubicle as I did said they did not see it in there. They said that phones left behind in the toilet, especially the one we were in, were often stolen and unlikely for owners to get them back. And there were many instances, they said.

And so, it was another crazy week in that sense. I didn’t know where my brain was in the last couple of weeks. A lot of things seem to go wrong.

Later that night, I was thinking whether I should just buy a cheap phone so that it wouldn’t cost much in case I lose it.

Before I slept, I just resign to looking for a phone soonest possible - the following day. I didn’t pray about it as I did the night before for the digital recorder to not be taken by anyone. But John decided to pray for me instead - that the person who stole it would be convicted to return the phone tomorrow. I didn’t expect much because God couldn’t be keeping a look out for us all the time due to our own carelessness.

The following morning, my colleague, Yuk Peng, told me that a reporter had handed over a phone to the parliament security and she would let me know later where to go have a look to see it was mine. I was hopeful, but also thought that it might not be mine.

At noon, she led me to the security guard who informed her about a phone that was handed to his department and I followed him to the office and when I saw the phone, I could not believe my eyes. I spotted the hole in the casing where the most regular button was used, which was obviously mine.

Later, Yuk Peng pointed me to the reporter who found my phone and I thanked her. She said that she was parking her motorbike in the morning before going into parliament building when she spotted a mobile phone lying by the roadside. She decided to pick it up and handed it over to the security.

Only God knows what happened to the phone between the toilet and the roadside that was more than 500m away. I know my phone could not have taken a stroll.

When I told John about it, he joked that Yuk Peng could have frightened off the thief when she sent an sms to my phone asking him/her to return the phone to the owner. That’s because, Yuk Peng, a dear colleague and friend was so popular in parliament, more popular than any MPs, for she has friends among the security guards right up to the ministerial and Speaker levels. The person could have known her and felt convicted when he/she saw her name. But then again, the offender could have dropped the phone while riding off his/her motorbike. It will remain a mystery.

I could only thank John for praying and the Almighty and guardian angels for watching over me even on such trivial matter.

Facing a giant

2009-12-03T01:00:00.000+08:00

Last week had been a rough one. And a rather queer one. It all began on Sunday (Nov 22) when at church, a visiting Vietnamese pastor from Australia whom I met for the first time prophesied on me and said, “Know your identity in Christ,” and “I am a conqueror in Christ,” a couple of times and he prayed for me to be strengthened and have confidence. I was puzzled. It was very rare that I had such encounter and the last was four or five years ago, where the Lord brought healing to my troubled heart and subsequently a certain addictive habit that I had wanted to overcome for years just naturally didn’t bother or have a hold on me anymore. It was literally a chain of bondage dropping off just like that. I come to realise that an addiction is a form of escapism and likely a reflection of deeper issues.

So what happened last week was totally crazy - besides ridiculous daily verbal lashings from assistant and copy editors who were overworked and under constant pressure, my condominium developer sent a few of us residents a legal suit.
It was a writ of summon for me to appear in High Court for a claim of a mere slightly over RM5,000.

See, we were looking forward to owning our strata title early this year, more than six years after vacant possessions were handed to us, when the developer slapped us with letters telling us that we, more than 300 owners, to pay an additional RM2 million in total as adjusted price owing.

We were told that there was a difference in the size of our individual units as stated in the Sale and Purchase Agreement and the ones stated in the recently-issued Strata Title. As the result, each owner was asked to pay between RM2,000 and RM10,000for the difference. The developer also held us in ransom by saying that they will not execute the Memorandum of Transfer of the properties until we settle the full amount owing.

Although some of us have asked for explanation from the Developer over the claim, we didn’t receive any reply. A few of the owners then went to the Petaling Jaya City Council (MBPJ) to examine the Building Plan together with a licensed surveyor who did a scale measurement and a few of the sizes were found to be similar to the ones stated in the Strata Title.

So we asked the developer to show us the approved building plan before we pay but the reply to some of the residents (which I didn’t receive) was that the building plan was already given together with the S&P. The plan was actually a rough one. Moreover, the general size on the S&P appeared similar to the one in the Strata Title, hence, it didn't make sense that the size was bigger.

Anyway, to cut the story short, instead of receiving some answers from the developer, we were threatened with legal letters and they now sue us in High Court (not even magistrate’s court at that).

When I received a threatening and rude legal letter the first time, I was really mad that they totally disregard our request for explanation and transparency, and now another bigger threat to sue us in High Court! I was saddened that they were not interested in talking with us and explaining things, but talking down on us and threatening us.

I felt as though I was facing a merciless giant with a huge sledge-hammer ready to strike anytime without care. I had never felt so small and a nobody for such a long time. How are we poor individuals going to fight a big and rich corporation? That moment, I knew the Word of Knowledge was given to me by the Pastor for the purpose. The Lord knew what was ahead and encouraged me ahead of time. How much we, his children are loved, despite our various shortcomings and imperfections.

We went to see a lawyer yesterday to help us file an appearance in the High Court.
Meantime, I appeal to all my wonderful and faithful brothers and sisters in Christ to stand in the gap for us in prayer. Would really appreciate that.

Hakone here we come

2009-11-03T02:00:00.000+08:00

The semi-double bed room we stayed at Khaosan Tokyo Samurai,Asakusa, was the latest addition to the Khaosan hostels. The picture showed how small it was. John and I had to fight for space during our sleep. That’s Tokyo, space is extremely limited and expensive. The hostel was clean and pleasant but the showers alternate between hot and cold and it was frustrating when it was chilly. I couldn’t sleep much during the night and then recalled that I had taken coffee in the morning. That usually happens to me when it’s hard to resist a good cup of coffee, regardless of the time of the day. Sigh!

Khaosan Tokyo Samurai

9.30am Yuko & Daishi picked us up from Khaosan to Hakone for hot spring (onsen) and Mt Fuji view. The drive took less than two hours to Hakone. We had lunch at Shikajaya in Hakone where they served tofu and taro meals, a specialty of Hakone.

Tofu and taro

A rickshaw in front of the restaurant.

We walked around Hakone before going on the cable car, which was like a subway train, to the top of the mountain. Since it rained yesterday, we did not manage to see the Mt Fuji from Hakone.

In Gora

We stopped by a massive view of the grassland before heading to the onsen.

We had to walk down cobbled-stoned steps amidst forested trees for about 10 min before we reached the Rakuyo Jurin Shizenkan onsen.
It was the first time John and I went naked in public. Sorry, no cameras were allowed at the onsen, for obvious reason. John and Daishi went to the men’s section while Yuko and I the ladies’ section. The onsen was magnificent. There was a tiled hot spring tub indoors and three square tubs made of wood and surrounded by trees outdoors. We went outdoors. We could sit or lay down in the onsen and it was relaxing. I was sensitive to hot water so I went in gently. The onsen contains natural minerals, said to be good for skin and health.

Out of the woods from the onsen and back on the road.

Daishi drove us back from Hakone to the Grand Terrace Shinjuku where we stayed with him and Yuko for a night. For dinner, we had sushi at a nearby restaurant. The couple wanted to show us the busiest spot in Tokyo but we were feeling too cold since it rained, and we decided to return to the apartment instead.

John and I gave them several packets of bah kut teh herbs, Malay sauces from Brahim’s and dodol for them to enjoy Malaysian food. Daishi and Yuko enjoyed the bah kut teh we brought them to in Old Town, Petaling Jaya, a few days after our wedding last year.

Yuko's Wedding Ceremony

2009-11-02T14:00:00.000+08:00

Nov 1 (Sunday) 2009

8.50am Woke up and frantically rushed down for breakfast after brushing our teeth and washing our face because breakfast was served only from 7am to 9am at the hotel. When we got to the restaurant, there were still people in there and the staff said they would close the kitchen at 9.30am. We were fortunate. The buffet was a Japanese and Western spread. The Japanese coffee was excellent. I could not resist having a small cup myself.

11.00am John and I met Daisuke at the ground floor by chance instead of the 11th floor. He led us to Yuko and Daishi’s wedding hall that looked like a chapel and was beautifully decorated. The hall was breezy and airy and classical music flowed from a live band. The feeling was spectacular.

The wedding ceremony was non-religious (Jinzen shiki style) and Daishi and Yuko exchanged vows in Japanese. In fact, the whole wedding was in Japanese. In Japan, a couple has to choose either the bridegroom's or bride's family name to adopt after they are married and Daishi and Yuko agreed on Yuko’s last name, Ito.

After the ceremony, a professional photographer took a picture of all of us from the floor above with a special opening, so all of us looked up and gave our best broad smiles.

The ceremony was followed by a cocktail and some informal photography sessions with the bride and bridegroom.

Yuko, Daisuke (right, standing) and I did our Master’s in Journalism at the Boston University in 1997/98. Daisuke was a Rotary Foundation Ambassadorial Scholar just like me where funds for our studies came from the Rotary Foundation.

The wedding reception was held on a different floor of the hotel. We were pleasantly surprised that Yuko left notes in small cards for both John and I (there were personal notes to all her 84 guests) on our table, telling us that she was glad that we could make it for her wedding and that she could not wait to drive us to Hakone. John and I were really touched!

The couple made a grand entrance to the hard-hitting rockish tune of Samurai Soul.

The cake had icons of the countries that the couple had visited and the coconut at the top of the cake represented Malaysia.

An eight-course Chinese lunch ala Japanese was served. First dish was "Five Kinds of Cold Dishes."

Environmentalists will not like me saying this. I was particularly impressed with the Braised Whole Superior Shark’s Fin in Matsutake Brown Sauce soup. Each of us had a whole small fin. Sorry, pix was overexposed, had to be touched up.

A light moment with the bridegroom.

Yuko and Daishi at our table. Each table was seated seven or eight people.

Yuko’s wedding reception card contained menu and on how Daishi and her met done in Manga. Above the card was Sauteed Beef and Zucchini in Oyster Sauce. Friends told stories of Yuko and Daishi through Manga style projected on the wall while photographs of them from the past were also shown. The Manga stories were creative, expressive and funny! The drawings below were done by one of Yuko’s friends who observed that each time he went to Yuko’s house, it was Daishi who was in the kitchen and not Yuko. I could not bring myself photographing the third drawing of Yuko bursting into tears, in front of her. While my mind was subconsciously processing, I missed the shot.

It was understood why Daishi hogged the kitchen. Daisuke, who sat beside me on the same table, translated for John and I saying that Daishi, who was a chiropractor and then a masseur, wanted to set up his own Ramen shop one day. He loves cooking and has just finished his three-year study to be a chef.

Quizes on the likes and dislikes of the couple were also held and each table representative held out a fan with a number to indicate the correct answer. It was a good way for us to know the couple more.

Later, Yuko's bosom buddies sang to her and wept as they shared about their good old days while a European music composer, who was also Yuko's friend, played the piano for them. Japanese weddings were very emotional, I was told!:)

Dessert was served.

Daishi and Yuko walking out at the end of the lunch reception.

Gifts from Daishi and Yuko for their guests: a bath set and Japanese doughnut. John was so impressed with how the doughnut box folded that he brought it home with him.

After the wedding, John and I took a walk with Daisuke. The three of us wanted to enter the Imperial Palace garden next to the hotel but since it was almost 3.30pm, the closing time we found out, the guard did not permit us to enter. So we walked around the palace and caught up on latest updates of our lives. Daisuke was a young man of 23 when we met at the uni and after 11 years since we left the uni, he is now a father of two, and he has hardly aged! It was ironic that Daisuke said Japan was too organised and structured and he liked the region where John and I were from, with the noise, a bit of foul smell in the air and haphazardness, like Bali, an island he had travelled to and liked. And there we were, telling him how we appreciated Japan for its high level of efficiency, organisation and politeness. Daisuke also said that due to the competitive lives they led, they had to work until late at night and entertain clients. He wished that his life moved at a slower pace but it was not a choice that he could have living in Japan.

After an hour, we parted ways. John and I moved our things out of KKR Hotel and took the subway to Khaosan Tokyo Samurai hostel.

Japan trip Oct 31-Nov 9

2009-10-31T16:00:00.000+08:00

Foon Fong’s journal on Japan trip from Oct 31 to Nov 9, 2009

John and I flew to Japan to attend a Japanese friend’s wedding and explore Tokyo and Kyoto after that. This is my fourth trip to Tokyo and John’s first.

Oct 31 (Sat)

12.20am Our flight on CA 972 from KLIA Terminal M was delayed and we took off at 1.20am, an hour later than scheduled. The seats were really tight and it was uncomfortable for John's legs. We barely slept on the plane and arrived at Beijing Terminal 3 at 7.30am, one hour later. After going through the immigration, I rushed all the way to the gate for the next connecting flight to Japan and because the airport was so big, we reached there at 8.10am. I panicked since there was no one manning the gate and I thought that boarding time had closed. Then when a female staff member of the flight walked over and asked what the matter was, I asked if we had missed the flight and she told me that the 8.20am time stated in my ticket was boarding time and all the while I thought it was take off time. You cannot imagine my relief. Still got time to go toilet la….Phew!

Plane flew off from Beijing Airport from Terminal 3 on CA 181 at about 9am instead of 8.40am and arrived Haneda Airport, Tokyo, at 1.10pm, 20 minutes later than scheduled. One of the two bags we checked in did not arrive. So we reported it to the airport authorities. I asked them if they could call me in an hour or two if they could send the bag through the incoming flight from Beijing tonight since they mentioned that they would see if they could do that through that flight. Otherwise, I would have to buy new clothes by evening for the wedding tomorrow.

Took the Tokyo monorail to Hamamatsucho Station and changed to Yamanote Line (green line). Got off at Tokyo Station and walked to a linked subway station to get to Takebashi stop. The journey took us one-and-a-half hours. Takebashi was just next to the KKR Hotel 1-4-1 Otemachi Chiyoda-ku Tokyo, where we stayed for one night for Yuko and Daishi’s wedding, courtesy of the couple.

During the monorail journey, I received a call from the airport authorities who informed me that it was possible to send my bag from Beijing to Japan tonight and they would send it to my hotel by 10pm.

At the hotel, a man at the reception desk handed us an envelope when we checked in and when I opened the enveloped in the room, it came with a welcome note from Yuko and Daishi and a packet of rose bath salts. It was totally relaxing to soak in a bath after a long sleepless journey. We were totally caught by surprise by Yuko's gesture.

John and I wanted to take a walk at the Tokyo Imperial Palace next to the hotel when we arrived but since we hardly slept in the flight, we took a nap from 4pm to 6pm. Then we explored the sights near the hotel and I had soba with some pieces of duck meat (in sauce) and rice while John had udon, rice and beef for dinner. Of course, the meals came with miso soup and green tea. Simple but nice food. We can’t read Japanese, so we don’t know the name of the outlet but I think it was a Japanese fast food joint because we had to pay through a vending machine and bring the coupons to the Japanese young man at the counter and he handed them over to the chef. The sole guy at the counter was the one serving food to customers and cleaning up the tables. I thought the whole set up was a creative way of keeping food affordable and wages fair.

Just before 10pm, my bag that was left behind by the airlines arrived at the hotel reception as promised. On hind sight, we didn't see the officer at the KLIA counter tag our bag when we checked in. It didn't occur to us then that he didn't do it after that. I didn't worry because I knew the Japanese were very efficient. Even if things go wrong, they are quickly rectified.

We were so exhausted that we slept by 11pm.

John's birthday

2009-07-26T00:14:00.000+08:00

I gave John a birthday treat at Victoria Station in Jalan Damansara on July 21, the day before his actual birthday. As usual, whenever we go for Western food, he'll aim for the steak while I'll order escargot as our Appetizer. I usually order seafood but this time I decided to go for steak plus scallops. It came with a decent portion of steak but only two miserable scallops. Being a seafood person, I had imagined the other way round...haha!

When I asked the waiter if there was anything special for the birthday boy, they took out a generous portion of brownies with walnuts for John at the end of our meal and sang a birthday song for John and took a picture of him and us.
That was pleasant. They did not make John stand on the chair like they would do in TGIF.

New hair cut that makes heads turn

2009-07-15T23:23:00.000+08:00

It has been two weeks since I have a hair cut and the positive comments from people have not stopped. I am pleasantly surprised myself and begin to wonder how I actually look because I can't really see myself except in the mirror and I can't view myself 360 degrees. When I had the haircut, I thought it was what I always wanted - something chic and modern.

The two hairstylists that I used to go to interchangeably, depending on my mood, just dare not try different cuts for me. Each time I tell them to do something different for me, the cut always ended up similar to the one before, except on rare occasions. I like the hairstylists for their detailed and good cut but now I have found a skillful hairstylist with amazing creativity, and the place is just behind my condo!

Tired of having the same hair style for more than a year, I decided to look for a new hairstylist. So when the new hair salon, Monsoon-ID opened earlier this year, I tried it out. It was all right but I was not totally impressed. I decided to give it another shot because I was not satisfied that I had not tried the top hairstylist. By the way, his name is Jimmy Cheng and his appointments are often full.

When I finally got my appointment and sat down, he was busy with two other women. One was at the tail end of his job so I could not see the transformation, but the long curly hair looks good. The other was cut from waist lenght right up to just above the shoulders and the details that he paid attention too made my jaw dropped. I could not wait for mine to be done.

Jimmy was initially hesitant about doing a drastic change for me even though I left it to him to do as he wished. I kinda go by gut feeling and seeing how his hair looked gave me the confidence that his style would suit me. So when I told him if he could give me something similar to his hair or one of his colleague's hair, he laughed and told me that I could not have that because those styles were more suitable for men. He said he would do a female version of the style and he would cut to suit my face.

I was really happy with the result although it did cost quite a bit including hair dying and treatment. But it was worth it.

My colleagues said of all the hair styles I have had, this is the best. And they reminded me not to do the totally short-fringe hair style anymore which I tried out some time back. I laughed because I intended it to look as though I was wearing a helmet. I called it the "helmet" look. I had told an Indonesian hairstylist (one of the two I used to go to and may still consider going for various reasons) to cut it that way. It was meant to be funny. I told my colleagues that it is good to have a sense of humour once in a while. After all life is stressful enough and sometimes painful so I think people should do things for themselves that make them happy and try not to hurt others.

Oh I forgot to mention. An opposition MP saw my hair and liked it so much that she went and get hers cut short as well, although a different style from mine. The hair had also gotten me a parking spot in a mall recently.

Pendek, Kechik, Black, Gemuk...

2009-05-29T01:11:00.000+08:00

While reading the story “Veteran Comedian needs help” in The Star (May 27, 2009) yesterday, I could not help but noticed how Kamal was described. He was “better known as Kamal Pendek”, says the paper, pendek meaning “short.” In other words, he was called “Kamal the Shortie” if we were to translate the meaning in the context.
In today’s world, some civilised soul would have been horrified to hear someone with disability being called names. It would have been deemed politically incorrect as well as downright rude. But there is more to it than meets the eye.
As far as I understand of the Malay community, especially the simpler and genuine folks whom I am fond of, they take life at a stride. I know of one who is called Kechik and another, Black, through the course of my work. Obviously, Kechik (old spelling) means he is of small frame and Black, because he has rather dark skin.
And the amazing thing about these folks is that they have no hang ups about their being called that way. They can look themselves in the mirror and accept themselves.
I read this joke that one of my brothers recently sent to me and the first bit is here:
MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE
NICKNAMES
• If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other
Laura, Kate and Sarah.
• If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to
each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.
I then realise perhaps it is a man’s thing after all and not about certain groups of the easy going Malays.
I am intrigued by this because I sometimes had issues because people would scold me for being “insensitive” but I have learned to adapt to different expectations.
Many years ago, I was close to a former colleague and pointed out to her about a guy in the aerobics class we attended who had a big torso but scrawny legs and being highly imaginative and innocently mischievious I shared a private joke with her and said that they looked like sticks or something to the effect. The following day, she told another colleague and both reprimanded me seriously for making what they called an insensitive remark. I was shocked. I was shocked that she took it out of context and was also shocked that what was shared with her in private was related to another person whom I thought would not be any of his business. I recalled the hurt and had wondered who were the ones who were actually insensitive. But being colleagues, I had moved on.
I am not sure why some people had such great hang ups about such remarks, unless, of course, it is related to some painful memories in the lives and of course, that should be made known and respected. Nevertheless, I have learnt not to let loose and be myself unless I know a person well or know that he or she has similar wavelength but even with that, sometimes I still forget with close friends when my guard is down. Some could never understand you and would assume the worse when you say something not according to their liking. They would always say that “you” must be careful with what “you” say without making an attempt trying to understand where you are coming from. Hmmm...is communication meant to be one way or two ways, with both parties trying to understand each other?
A colleague recently asked me if I was pregnant since I had regained some weight after my wedding, and I told her, “No, I am just fat (around my belly),” and those around me just laughed. I was glad because I had known of people who were so upset over such question and could not accept that they had put on some weight.
As we grow older, we should learn to laugh at ourselves and not to take such remarks too seriously.
However, there are words that I would avoid such as calling someone stupid or some vulgar or derogatory names even if in jest.
Ok, I got to do some crunches before I go to bed now. It’s past 1am. Yikes.

Savouring pineapple with mum

2009-05-09T21:00:00.000+08:00

I could have been around 5 years old at that time. I was home with mum in Malacca. It was likely that my father had not passed away then because mum, being a housewife, was home. I believe my father, who was a teacher, and my two older brothers had gone to school. I don't recall where my youngest two-year-old brother was but I suspect he could be sleeping in the room.

Mum gave me 5 sen and asked me to go to a sundry shop nearby to buy a slice of pineapple for us to eat (which we now pay RM1 in the Klang Valley). I was thrilled. At that age, simple things in life just bring so much delight and make you happy.

With the 5 sen in my hand, I ran to the sundry shop as fast as I could. I just love to run and would run to just anywhere instead of walking. Besides the sundry shop, I would run to my grandparents' house around the corner or to the breadman who peddled his foodstuff. It was safe for children to do things on their own then and there were no worries about us being kidnapped or killed. It was the 70s.

At the shop, I handed over the 5 sen to the shopkeeper and pointed to the pineapple in the fridge to him. If I remember correctly, he put the pineapple onto a small piece of newspaper for me. Plastic was hardly used then. Yes, those were the days and we did not hear of anyone dying due to ingestion of newspaper ink.

I took the pineapple in newspaper and again, raced myself home. Just as I was about to reach the house gate, I tripped and fell on the hard sandy ground. The pineapple was thrown out of my hand, fell to the ground, and was partially covered by sand. I wasn't sure whether I cried out of pain or seeing the pineapple falling to the ground. I thought it was the end of our enjoyment. The pineapple could not be eaten anymore and there was no such thing as a replacement. My happiness was shortlived.

My mum heard my cry and came out to help me up. She cleaned me up and to my surprise, she had picked up the pineapple and was washing it. Before I knew it, we were both sitting on the stools in the small kitchen of our two-room house and ate the pineapple that she had cut into two.

I thoroughly enjoyed the sweetness of the pineapple, and the moment was even sweeter with mum.

No, we did not have a tummy ache after that. In fact, possibly due to incident like this, our immune systems were strong and mum and I were hardly sick.

This childhood incident keeps playing in my mind in the last few weeks that I feel I should to write it down for Mother's Day.

This is written in memory of my late mother, Mdm Chin Meow Lian, who passed away in the year 2000 at age 64.

Thanking all

2008-08-31T14:59:00.000+08:00

copied from my notes in the weddingpath news which has expired.

September 8, 2008

John and I want to say a BIG 'thank you' to all our guests who had travelled from near and far for our wedding. We really appreciate your presence... and also your gifts. We also want to thank those who could not attend our wedding but had surprised us with wedding gifts and cards. Really appreciate 'em all.We want to thank all the 50 plus helpers who had made the wedding day so wonderful. Wedding coordinators Ricky Liew and Shawn Low did a fantastic job in handling the day's headache for us so we could sit back and relax.Thank you Leong Seng Keat & family who have given us an unexpected'ang pow' before the wedding (and also again during the wedding!) which has helped us in making the wedding celebration even better. And Mary Anne Tan for the unexpected chain and cute diamond pendant. I wore it for the morning ceremony.We also want to thank Mum (John's) for standing by with 'ang pows' for unexpected moments and for giving so generously. Datuk Tee and Emily (John's sister) for the lovely wedding cakes for us and the guests. Many people said the cakes (served in the morning) are so pretty and taste excellent!
A very BIG thank you to Ho Tiong Keng and his company Kim Guan Press Entreprise for the great job in printing our wedding cards.
To all our family members, relatives, close friends and colleagues who had given us so much, we want to tell you that the big 'ang pows' we received covered the full cost of the 8-course wedding dinner AS WELL AS the full cost of the morning church ceremony! John and I had taken out all our savings for the morning ceremony and considered that as a treat for our guests without expecting anything back,and for the dinner, we had only hope that it will break even or just have to trust God if in debt. But instead we were blessed out of our socks! Here is the list of people we would like to note with special thanks:1/2. Lee Cheow Pheng and Guat Bee (pre-marital counsellors)3. Pr Tan Moy How (officiating Pastor) 4. Bessie Mak (chief wedding ministry) 5/6. Ricky Liew (wedding coordinator)& wife Sharon. 7/8. Shawn Low (wedding coordinator) & Yossi. 9. Jeremy Phun (best man) 10. Ooi Yi Ling (bridesmaid/maid of honour)11. Loh Kin Kien (brother giving away Foon Fong and bridal car driver)12. Jamilah Adom (dressing up the bridal party children)13. Selina Loh (teenage bridesmaid)14. Jizen Loh (page boy)15. Julia Loh (flower girl)16. Angie Lee (make-up artist)17. Kamal (professional photographer)18. Mary Anne Tan (photographer day) 19. Jonathan Khoo (photographer night)20. Pr Richard Evans (worship leader) 21. Su Ann (keyboardist) 22. Stephen (guitarist)23. Orient (drummer)24. Joseph (bassist) 25. Pr Lai Kam Poh (emcee - Chinese)26. Chan I'Ching (emcee - English)27. Mrs Lim Kam May (tea ceremony coordinator)28. Arthur Daniel (nite photography runner)29. Alvin Tang (chair for bride, night photography runner, decor)30. Daniel Wee's video team31. Hannah Chiam (head financial)32. Loh Keng Sing (financial caretaker)33. Ho Tiong Keng (head ursher, financial caretaker, decor)34. Lee Weng Seng (financial caretaker)35. Patrick Soh (Head reception day/night, decor)36. Putri Siti Norhayati (day reception)37. Putri Siti Nordiyana (day reception)38. Tan Ru It (day reception)39. Mdm Lai (night reception)40. Karen Lim (night reception)41. Stephanie Lim (night reception)42. Sandy Au Yong (night reception, appreciation gifts for parents, decor)43. Susan Tan (usher, appreciation gift, decor)44. Jasmine Tan (usher, decor)45. Patricia Kong (usher, decor)46. Kathy Choi (usher, decor)47. Serge Kouassi (chair for bride, decor)48. Olga Kouassi (decor)49. Promise (decor)50. Kuan Kew (decor)& Khoo for driving
51. Car decorators - Jade and ....(Sorry, trying to recall your name)52. Anna and Das' daughters - sourcing for night musicWe also appreciate Pastor Pala (John's pastor) and Pastor Daniel Ho (Foon Fong's pastor) for saying grace before meals.Have we left out anyone? Please let us know.Thank you everyone, for all your contributions in small and big ways on our BIG day. They are all very much appreciated. I am trying to figure out how I can download the pix for ya all...Foon Fong

We had wanted to sing a birthday song to John's boss, Andrew, and John's cousin, Stephanie, because their birthdays fall on our wedding day but we totally forgot. Sorry about that... But here's a belated happy birthday wish and hope you have a wonderful year ahead!

Tea ceremony

2008-08-31T03:10:00.000+08:00

Pix showing John and Foon Fong serving tea to John's mum, Mdm Lim.

Chinese tea ceremony was held at about 12 noon with family members and immediate aunts and uncles at the church upstairs.

For our overseas friends who are not familiar with the tea ceremony, a newly wedded couple would serve tea to parents, older siblings, aunts and uncles as a way of being introduced to one another. The couple will usually receive gold jewellery (for the bride) while the groom the red packet (ang pow), or both could receive the red packet instead of jewellery. In the past, gold jewellery served as a form of insurance (for emergency use) for a couple starting a family or kept as family heir loom.

In turn, the couple would give the red packet to younger siblings, nephews and nieces who serve them tea.

Foon Fong's appreciation speech

2008-08-31T02:00:00.000+08:00

Appreciation of parents speech for church wedding ceremony

Good morning Pastor Moy How, family members, relatives and friends. I am really happy to see all of you today.

I would like to briefly mention the love my late parents, Mr and Mrs, Loh Andrew, had shown towards me and the care shown by my older siblings towards my younger brother and me. My parents were wonderful care givers and were exemplary parents in their own ways.

As far as I could remember of my father, whom I lost when I was little, and my mother, they were responsible, caring and sacrificial parents, not only towards us, but also towards their parents and others in need.

They often thought about others above themselves. My mother, she hardly pitied herself nor was she bitter about life despite her hardship and poverty of being a widow of four young children, but found amazing providence, joy, love and hope in God.

This legacy of knowing a loving God from my parents has enabled me to journey through the insanity of life and experience his love as well as miracles in my life.
Malay people call their fathers, "Abah," while I, like other Christians, call our God, "Abba."

The spelling may be a little different but the meaning is the same. It means, "Father."

On top of that, in my faith, the fatherless has a special place in Abba's heart
and I had the privileged of experiencing much providence, protection and love in miraculous ways.

While growing up, my two older brothers watched over us two younger ones. My eldest brother, Mong En, would cut my finger nails and teach me to read as well as encourage me in my studies while my second brother, Kin Kien once protected me from boys who tailed me home. Once, I was chased by a dog and he came for my rescue. He growled and barked at the dog and the dog ran away. He was my hero that day. Kin Kien also led me and my younger brother, Keng Sing, to play in a farm nearby with him, which we remembered with fond memories until today.

Since Mong En and his wife, Ean Leng, could not be with us today, I would like Kin Kien and his wife Jamilah to receive a token of my appreciation for the sacrifices that the older siblings have made. I know that if my parents were still alive today, they would be very happy for me.

(End of speech.)

For this blog:
I would also like to add that my two older brothers had provided for me financially according to their means while I was studying in a university for four years. This had enabled me to, likewise, support my youngest brother financially when he went to university after I graduated.

John's appreciation speech

2008-08-31T01:45:00.000+08:00

in the process...waiting for him to fill in...

Church wedding

2008-08-31T01:00:00.000+08:00

We arrived at the Damansara Utama Methodist Church in less than 15min and Nicolas, the traffic marshall, guided us to the church doorstep. Kin Kien, my chauffeur and brother who was giving me away was given a corsage and my veil was adjusted to cover my face.
At 10am, the wedding hall was opened. My heart almost stopped beating when I saw so many people and I was actually quite nervous while being thankful that many came. I was not nervous yesterday during the rehearsal because the hall was empty!
Everything was beautiful. The day was sunny and beautiful after a whole week of rain, as though it was made just for us. The hall has minimal but lovely decorations.
Jizen Loh, 11, my nephew, was the first to walk down the aisle with the ring, followed by Julia, 6, her sister, the flower girl, Selina, 15, another sister, the young bridesmaid, followed by Ooi Yi Ling, the maid of honour.
KK, my second brother, walked down the aisle with me smilling from ear to ear as though he was the proud father giving away his daughter:). He then handed my hand over to John and John said "thank you." John who had waited patiently for me later that night told me that due to the delay, some people were joking that I might have changed my mind and decided not to turn up. John was pretty cool about it and he said that it was still my prerogative to decide.
The praise and worship songs were sung with much cheerfulness. I thought I had to do a last minute change to the songs the night before since it took a heavy toll on Orient, the drummer who during rehearsal, had to muster all his energy to play all four fast songs at one go but Pas Richard, the song leader, assured that he could do it.
After the celebrative songs were sung, we were all seated. Two volunteers took two special chairs out for John and I to sit on. When we were nicely seated, Pas Tan Moy How, who would be conducting the wedding ceremony, asked us an impromtu question about what we would say to each other on this special day. He said the question often catch the marrying couple off guard but John spoke without hesitation of his hopes for us as a married couple together while I just said: "I believe we will do well," which sparked off laughter among the guests who attended.
I just wanted to be positive because even after three years of dating, our relationship had not been easy. I think that was partly because we were getting married at an older age and clearly we were not totally blissful and unaware of each other's faults. Pastors have always reminded us to open our eyes real big when choosing a life-partner and when married, keep one eye close. I had opened my eyes so big that marriage was totally frightening. How could human beings, being imperfect, live together? If not for my believe in God's grace and love who will preserve and sustain our love and relationship until death, I don't know how I could see it last a lifetime. Marriage requires hard work and I just had to say we would do well, out of faith. Marriage is definitely an act of faith and requires a lot of courage.

to be con't....

The BIG DAY!

2008-08-30T21:00:00.000+08:00

I (Foon Fong) woke up at 6am after four hours of sleep. The last thing I did the night before was to write a parents' appreciation speech (in my case, more targeted at my bros since my parents have passed on), after picking up the bridal car at church where it was decorated.
At 6.35am, I went downstairs to the mamak shop for breakfast. My bridesmaid was supposed to join me but I decided to eat on my own after waiting for 15min. The make-up artist and family got a bit delayed while the hairstylist had not arrived by 7am. I did not know who was supposed to start first since both said that either one could start first, so I had given an hour each to both of them. So by 9.15am I should be ready to leave the condo and get to church and walk in by 9.30am as planned.
But the perfect timing crumbled from the beginning. I had a terrible tummy upset after breakfast due to indigestion. It was nothing to do with the mamak food but stress. I got delayed further. I was all faintish and thinking how I would be able to go through the day when I'Ching, a close friend, SMSed me, telling me that she was praying for John and I that things would go smoothly. For one who was not easily comforted, I was instantly at peace from that moment.
I knew I was going to be half-an-hour late and my colleagues would be disappointed because I had promised those who were working that day that I would turn up at 9.30am and they could go back to work by 10.30am. My sincere apologies....
Angie Lee, my cell member, did a nice, natural and stunning make up for me while my hairstylist, Eron, did a pretty fast job and I was ready to leave my condo by 9.40am.